Memories of a lifetime with family
During the 1970's growing up I remember we used to look after a beautiful female foxterrier whom belonged to our next door neighbour, her name was Suzi. This was my first best friend and it felt like she was my own dog as we used to take her in quite often when our neighbours went on holiday. One sunny day it was late in the afternoon and the neighbours facing our front door had a red brick wall next to their house and I was over by the neighbour playing with their kids outside in the garden. I decided I was gonna climb this wall cos being a young small boy I was always very curious and up for a challenge as to find out what certain things would be like after exploring them. So I climbed the wall and found out in no time that this wall was not sturdy (cement plastered) and gave way as soon as I climbed it. It collapsed in an instant and I had got such a fright but after sustaining some minor bruises on my leg. My ego was the biggest injury I sustained though, 😂 😂.
At the age of 4 I had an accident after falling into the hot tub in Youngsfield military base and sustained a fair amount of burns to my body as described in 'my life story'. I also had a great fear of heights and at the age of 11 or 12, I went to a school friend's house and his dad was also in the military. They had a huge trampoline in the backyard and always enjoyed playing and jumping on it as a kid the few times I did visit them. They also had a big old tree in their backyard and they had a wooden platform fitted across some of the tree branches (tree house) high up in the tree. So I climbed up the tree and attempted to move across to another tree branch and my hand slipped off the tree branch and I fell to the ground flat onto my back approximately 3 to 4 metres down. I had some pain but it was more so the shock of that moment as I could not believed what had just happened. I swiftly got up and walked home crying.
Whilst living in Kenwyn and after getting my first BMX bicycle for Christmas in 1983, I had my personal transport and couldn't wait exploring other areas outside of our home suburb. So I would choose a day during the school holidays and go out for the day on a trip with my BMX which was very exciting. So I would plan the day in advance and get everything ready for my day trip out to areas like Kirstenbosch, Constantia, Newlands public swimming pool, Wynberg military base where we had lived previously and my mom would make me a bunch of sandwiches that I'd take with on my travels. I would also have a 2 litre Coca-Cola or Fanta orange and some sweets with a small amount of money to buy something in addition to my cold drink and picnic foods I already had. Some times I would take a friend with me to join me on my day trips.
Many times my mom, my brother and myself would take a trip to town taking the train into Cape Town which was always very exciting to me because I loved the train rides as a kid. We would spend the day in Cape Town walking the streets up and down and end up doing shopping 🛒 in The Golden Acre and having lunch upstairs in the restaurant in the OK (now Shoprite).
As a family we would sometimes travel to family either in the Eastern Cape and / or the Transvaal. I used to love the long trips although they were few and far between. Nevertheless it was a blast and we would stop along the way and my mom had made chicken and cooked potatoes along with some rice and other veggies.
We would also have pudding which consisted of instant pudding and jellies all pre-packed into a picnic packed set of containers my dad purchased especially for the long trips during the holidays.
As a small boy I was very close to my mom but later years things changed as I then got closer to my dad as I was rebellious as I got older and had many clashes with my mom but would later years get better over the years as I got used to it but never stopped loving my mom. There would be certain words exchanged after which I would later regret as I was still very naive and still had alot to learn about life in general.
My dad was a very strict straight forward person and did not stand for any nonsense whatsoever. If you didn't listen, he would merely lift his big hands and take a good hard swing at us and you know what you have done wrong and believe me, it did not tickle. It hurt like hell. Those were the good ole days and I never regret my upbringing ever.
It taught me respect and improved my character as a person. One day my dad sent me down to the garage to collect some potatoes as it was stored there.
I would always get in my dad's car and play with the car switches until one day, I snapped the cable that unlocked the bonnet. My dad was very enraged and he gave me good hiding as a result. Eversince that day he always kept the car locked whilst parked in the garage.
He had to spend money to have it repaired. As a ruling because of similar events that resulted in things breaking, I stopped fiddling with other people's property as I was always extremely curious what a button on a radio or some or other piece of equipment would do, had I pressed it. I would always end up breaking something or something would fall and break, so I eventually learned my lesson as a kid and stopped messing with stuff that either didn't belong to me or did not apply to me.
Memories with my Dad (Adolf)
As a kid I didn't spend much time with my dad as he wasn't always the emotional type but loved him to bits always. The times we did get to spend together, was always very special to me. When I was still very small, my mom used to buy a magazine on a weekly basis which had a kids magazine inside. On a Saturday afternoon on the weekend my dad had me lying next to him on his bed and he read some of the stories out of the kids magazine to me. In 1989 I had written my exams after studying part time at Cape College (attended classes 3x a week). My dad and I came back from town one day in the week, I was upset over something but my dad comforted me as we approached the military base to return to work as I was busy with my military service at the time (I was 18 yrs old). Well he turned the car around right there and then and drove back to Cape Town as I had mentioned to him that I didn't find out what my results were after writing exams and wasn't sure whether I had failed or passed. We arrived back in town at the college and I went upstairs to get my results. I came back downstairs and got in back into the car and told my dad I passed. My dad was in tears instantly as he heard that I passed. We drove back to work and that was one of the very special times together with my dad. It's these memories that makes thoughts and happy moments like this make remember my dad as my hero. He was hard on the exterior but very much a softy on the inside.
In 1988 it was my last year at school and I had finished school although I failed, I was finished with school as I wanted to get on with my life and complete my two year military service. I think my dad was off that day and we went for a long drive as it was a weekday and school was out. We went for a drive down to Fish Hoek and Simonstown and my dad showed me and told me alot of stories of his past, during his time when he was stationed in Simonstown. He went to show me where the house stood where he lived many years ago with his first wife and where he also had lived prior to Simonstown in Fish Hoek in a flat. That building still stands today. I went back to that building when I was still mourning my dad's death during the nineties just like I remembered the day he showed me the building, where he lived many years prior to that day, as I was reliving that time in my mind and was trying to picture myself during that time frame when my dad lived there. This was one of the ways I dealt with my father's passing. The drive we took in December 1988 I will always remember as one of the highlights in my life as it was one of those father-son moments we spent alone together.
My dad and I spent alot of time together at home when he would repair something like the stove, washing machine door locks and general maintenance around the house and I had learnt alot from those times. I would often fix the vaccuum cleaner when needed some minor repairs with knowledge I was taught by my dad.
In 1993 after my dad had fallen ill, I went away on holiday for about two weeks and when I arrived back home my dad was in tears to see me and so I hugged him and told him "don't worry I'm home now" I miss my dad like mad and wish he was still here on earth with me.
Memories with my Mom (Christine)
I was a mommy's boy when I was a small kid as I was the youngest and probably got away with alot. But those were my favourite years as well cos I used to get alot of attention from my mom. I spent most of my time with my mom as my dad was at work all day. So my mom would walk me to school early in the morning and then I would get so lonely because I saw my mom walk away going home after dropping me off at school and felt very vulnerable and would burst into tears 😭 but over time it got better and I got used to school.
My mom left to attend her brother's (my uncle) funeral in Pretoria and I would be alone with my dad but missed my mom so much. Then when she got home after about a week I was overwhelmed with excitement and could not wait to see her after I got home from school that day. I always felt my mom protected me when I was still very small. My mom was my everything at that point in my life. She and I used to play alot of games and jokes over the years even until shortly before she passed away we had our little games and jokes we used to play ▶. My mom told me quite alot about her mother (my grandmother) and I wished I had known her personally.
Memories with friends
During my lifetime I met and have had some great friends. I would like to name two of them. Their names are Damian and Chris. I met Damian and Chris in 1991 and we formed a bond as friends and used to spend alot of good times together like having parties, braai and go drive around or go watch stock cars at the old Goodwood show grounds.
As a small boy I didn't have many friends as I was very shy and didn't like strangers. It was almost like I used protect myself in that regard.
It was only after I had my first job and owned my first car that I started wondering farther and beyond. I got introduced to alcohol and over the years drinking got worse when I would visit friends or attend a party etc. After a very bad experience with alcohol in February 2009, I decided that this was the last time I would ever touch alcohol ever again. I decided stop smoking, drinking as well as drinking sodas. That was a wake up call for me and a turning point in my life. Everything changed for me at that point. The two friends that always stood by me through thick and thin has been Chris and Damian.
Chris was there for me for emotional support when my dad passed away in April 1995. Damian has been there for me as well many times since my mom passed away and helped me with lots of different things in my lifetime over the years even before my mom's passing. These are two friends I regard very highly as my own family.
This blog was written by Chris DeFlamingh
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